Interracial Marriage
Mary & Werner -
Westmalle, Antwerpen, Belgium
Married April 2019
Dinner, Dance Moves and a Proposal
When “Happi15” got a Flirt from “WeDog” on our site, neither knew that one day they’d be married! But that’s exactly what happened…
First, let’s ask Mary (“Happi15”) what inspired her to try this. “I chose online dating because of my busy life, which makes it difficult to get to the social places that make it possible to meet new people,” Mary explains. We weren’t the first site she tried, however. “My first experience was okay, but slow,” she reveals. “Where you can’t really tell who’s serious and who is not. But having people willing to open up about themselves helped me learn to share about my experiences, and life in general.”
She liked our site better because of its track record with singles finding love. “The success stories made me feel confident to try my chances too,” Mary says. Though she gave herself no better than a 50/50 shot at becoming one of them, she had no better ideas. “It was the only option I thought possible, so I had to keep on keeping on!”
Werner (aka “WeDog”) was guardedly optimistic, going in. “I had a feeling she was somewhere, and not so far away,” he says of his soulmate. “It was hard at the beginning, but I’m glad I was patient! It all paid off.”
It took quite a bit of patience in fact, from both of them, to find their match. Werner was a member for four years and Mary for three, on and off, before their paths crossed. It all started when he spotted her profile. “Her beauty” stood out to him, but that wasn’t all. “She had a well-written and balanced profile that I read several times,” Werner remembers.
His curiosity piqued, Werner decided to put in the effort to appeal to someone with a profile that strong. He crafted a carefully composed email and sent it off, with fingers crossed.
Mary appreciated Werner’s effort to impress. In addition to the email, which she thought was well written, it was Werner’s profile that convinced Mary to respond. “He mentioned being a family man, which is what I was after,” she tells us. “His age was attractive, and so were his pics.”
Their initial interactions were encouraging. “I could tell from our conversation she was different,” says Werner. “It was surely one I wanted a chance to continue.” Mary was ready to do just that, in person. “It was the only way to really confirm the feeling I had,” she says.
So Werner made travel plans. “After two months of everyday chat, I wasn’t about to wait any longer,” he says. “My conviction was right!” Mary picks up the story there. “He came to me in the United Kingdom and I booked a hotel for him, close to my home, because I wasn’t ready to welcome a stranger into my home for the first time. He loved my idea of the hotel and the thoughtful touches I included.”
“When I traveled to meet her I found everything well organized for me,” Werner says of the arrangements awaiting him in the U.K. Mary vividly recalls the moment she first laid eyes on him. “He was waiting at the bus stop for me to pick him up,” she says. “We were both nervous. I was kinda numb but got better in time. Later it eased up and we got along pretty well, actually!”
Werner has fond memories of that day. “Our first hug was the best thing ever! I knew there and then I wasn’t wrong all along. She was pretty, mature, and mine!” By the end of his visit things had changed. “She prepared lunch at her house on my last day in the U.K., which made me think, ‘she respects and trusts me.’”
They don’t provide details, but the couple admits that Werner called his ex-wife during their first date, which Mary calls “awkward.” She let him off the hook for that, and we will too – he must have had a good reason!
After Werner went home and they got back to their usual routines, they reflected on what this new relationship might mean. “I liked his caring nature through our long talks,” says Mary. But at that point she was only “70%” certain they would meet again, given the distance between them (and maybe that phone call!). Werner was more positive. “100%, no doubt,” he says. “I wanted to persuade her if there was a reason to say no!” Mary laughs at that. “His persistence is so attractive.”
Of course, we know how the story went from there. It became easy for Mary to love Werner, she says. “He’s a family man, loves children, and has true love to share.” Werner appreciates that Mary is “outspoken, and both marriage- and family-minded.”
Of course, distance was an obstacle, but it didn’t stop them. A moment that stands out to Werner was at a family gathering. “At my sister’s place on Thanksgiving, I was surrounded by family but I couldn’t keep my mind together – I needed to hear her voice! I did find some privacy to call her and I asked her if I could call her ‘baby.’ I remember how relieved I was when she said, ‘That sounds great!’”
“The question” was popped some time later. “I traveled to see her, as had become more common,” begins Werner. “She was working, so I prepared dinner for her. I knew she doesn’t like surprises so much, so after dinner, a few glasses of wine, and a few dance moves, she was tired and wanted to go to bed. Before she freshened up I went to the bedroom and put on her pillow a hand-written note asking her to say yes. Once beside her I got down on one knee.... There were tears flowing on both of our cheeks. She held my hand and helped me up... It was a yes! A year later, she’s officially my wife.”
Mary is delighted to have this component of her life squared away. “I’m complete,” she says. “I’m in love, I’m happy!” Werner says that their relationship gives him “more focus” and adds, “Just to know someone loves you… It’s the best feeling in the world.”
Looking back at it all, Mary has come up with this advice for anyone out there who wants to meet Mr. Right. “Never give up! He is right around the corner, wishing you can only wait a little while. Have patience and keep it real!”
“The big reward awaits you,” Werner promises singles. “Keep trying.”
It took these two several years of trying to connect with someone special, but now we hope many more years of happiness are ahead for them.
Click here to read more inspiring interracial couples stories.
